Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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