Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
