Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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