I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize