I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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