I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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