we're blogging at a bar
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
