Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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