i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
my sisters under your porch take her home
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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