the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
whose parrot is this?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
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