i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
