Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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