Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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