i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
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