I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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