Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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