Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Do vagina's smell?
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
