Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
