You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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