Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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