I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
My vagina just recognized that song.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
