operation harelip BJ is a go
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
