another moral hangover. fuck.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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