Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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