Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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