9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
