I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Randomize
