She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Sober January is a disaster.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
