she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
All the doctor said was why
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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