It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
