Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize
