Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
