Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Randomize
