id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
