that's an acceptable place to lick
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
