she smelled like a LAN party
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I just want to make out with him forever
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
