i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
In other news, I just burned my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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