Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
That accounts for only three of the penises
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
