Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
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mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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