She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
