No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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