I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
