Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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