i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
