Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
