We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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