How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
