HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
