So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
