she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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